The founders of ‘Merica Labz – rumored to be direct descendants of George Washington – sat in a first grade classroom one day, coloring a sheet their teacher provided. As the lesson concluded, the teacher walked up to the founders, cocked her head, and in a reassuring but still unsure voice said, “Boys, why is your crocodile red, white, and blue? Crocodiles are green.” The founders looked up at her, with eyes glaring like a proud bald eagle and said, “Ma’am, them’s the only colors there is.”
The founders of ‘Merica Labz left school that day, never to return. From the age of six, they dedicated their lives to creating the most ‘Merican dietary supplements the world would ever know. After bottling the sweet, decadent smell of a bald eagle’s sweat; distilling the majesty of a sunrise over the Grand Canyon; and extracting the most bioactive compounds in a Fourth of July barbecue, the key ingredients were finally determined. Freedom in a bottle had arrived.
Now, that Freedom is widely-available to every liberty-loving man and woman from sea-to-shining-sea. What is Freedom in a bottle anyway, you might be asking yourself. Well, it’s serving sizes double, triple and sometimes more what the “industry standard” is. It’s combining those ingredients in an FDA-approved, cGMP (certified good manufacturing practices) facility that adheres to pharmaceutical-level standards of manufacturing. It’s delicious flavors like Freedom (for real) and Blood, Sweat, and Tears (also for real) and Yosemite S’Mores with real marshmallows and chocolate chips (real marshmallows and chocolate). It’s the best ingredients, bar none, each and every time. It’s donating $1 from every single unit of Red, White & BOOM sold to veteran’s charities. It’s sharing a some of the proceeds from our Freedom in a bottle, with those who have fought and bled to protect it.
As you consider brands to use or bring into your stores, consider this: have you ever felt the urge to hop in a ’68 Camaro and do doughnuts in a WalMart parking lot while fireworks shoot out of the trunk? If the answer is yes, then ‘Merica Labz products are for you.
P.S., did we tell you that our only sponsored athlete is all around badass, pure ‘Merican motherf@%ker Derick Carver? Derick’s a combat veteran and member of the 82nd Airborne Division, the World’s Strongest Disabled Athlete, and just cool AF.